The Manifold Joys of Writing

Me: *happily outlining the first few scenes of my novel*
My Characters: (after every scene) “HEY! HEY, you wanna know a secret?”
My Characters: “I DON’T BELONG HERE! HEY, Hey, I’m actually in love with this person! Hey, hey you, author-type person! I HAVE AAAALLLL the skeletons in my closet! HEY, don’t forget about this!”
Me:….”Anything else I should know?”
My Characters: “Is this really how you’re writing me? Maybe you should just start all over. That’s SOOO not me.”
Me:…*bangs head against keyboard*

Oh, the joys of writing. They are endless.